Rock Bottom of Poison
by Ambitiouswords
Summary: Game night at Kara's leads to an early exit from Maggie and Alex. This causes Maggie to start a much needed conversation with Alex about her drinking habit, that is steadily turning into so much more. Complete for now.
1. The Conversation

"I wish we had a pool table here, I'd be beating you all!" Alex complained as she waved her arm at the surrounding people playing Monopoly on game night. Maggie grabbed the flailing arm as it reached her to halt it from hitting her in the face.

"I'm not sure you would in this state, Danvers." she chuckled. Alex, failing to take note of the joking tone to her girlfriend's voice, started to rise from her seat on the floor.

"You wanna bet? Let's go, Sawyer." Alex didn't make it upright before she stumbled and Maggie pulled her back down to her side.

"I don't think so."

Kara flew in at that moment, arms skillfully carrying more drinks to satisfy her guests. She put half in the fridge to chill, then brought the others through to the gathering of adults. James politely declined, stating that the Guardian could be needed at any time, causing Kara to roll her eyes. That didn't stop Winn from indulging along with Lena, Mon-el and Kara. Alex sluggishly grabbed another drink by crawling over Maggie to get to it.

"Alex, you really are _letting a goose_ tonight. It's unusual to see," Mon-el piped up from his place on one of the chairs. Lena immediately began to choke on her drink as Winn and Maggie were almost in tears from laughter.

"It's _letting loose_ , Mon-el." Kara clarified as she awkwardly patted Lena's back. Mon-el's eyes widened in understanding.

"I thought it sounded a little strange…"

Maggie gave a half-shrug, "It's true, though. Alex, you're pretty much wasted."

"Oh, I see," Alex started, on the defensive, "Let's just look at the characters we have in the room. You're not drinking because of work," she pointed at Mon-el, "Not human," then Kara, "Not human," then Lena, "Is she human? I don't think so. And Winn is tipsy and James is too far up his own-"

"Okay, that's enough," Maggie swiftly took the drink out of Alex's hand and passed it to Lena, who looked slightly bewildered by the whole interaction, "You're making a fool out of yourself, maybe we should go back to your apartment."

"We haven't finished Monopoly. Or game night in general!" Kara protested.

Maggie looked at her guiltily, "I know, sorry, you can still play with these guys. But what if Alex starts hitting on Lena or something like last time."

"Oh, good point. Come on, Alex. Time to go." Kara stood and moved to haul Alex to her feet, meeting resistance from her sister.

"Kara, you are not the boss of me. I'm not even slurring my words." she defended. Kara looked skeptical and carried on dragging Alex in the general door direction, the conversation proving to be a good distraction.

"We'll see if you still feel that way in the morning."

Maggie met them at the door after saying her goodbyes, just as Alex realised they were at the door. And Kara was pushing her out of the door.

"Kara-" Alex was cut off by the door slamming in her face. From inside, Kara could hear her sister complaining to Maggie, "She threw us out. Why would she do that?"

Smug with herself, Kara mentally replied, _I'm not letting you flirt with Lena again._

* * *

By the time Maggie had managed to safely direct herself and Alex back to the apartment, Alex seemed to have sobered up to become more aware of the last hour.

"I embarrassed you, I'm sorry." she said, looking up from Maggie's shoulder as they rested on the couch. The vibrations of Maggie's laugh rippled through Alex's body.

"You didn't embarrass me, only yourself," Maggie corrected. A couple of beats passed before she continued, more serious than before, "Alex...I've noticed you're drinking more. I don't know if you don't realise, or it's work stress or _us._ I just hope you know you can talk to me."

Maggie looked down at Alex whose head had come back to rest on her shoulder, felt how her breathing had slowed against her body. Assuming her drunken girlfriend had finally succumbed to sleep, Maggie let her own head drop back against the couch and her eyes fall shut.

"I know."

The soft, quiet words were spoken just as Maggie felt the heaviness hit her eyelids. She wrenched them open and stared into the darkness of the room. The weight of Alex's head left her shoulder as Alex spoke.

"I never thought I would become the person I was before the D.E.O again. I thought that, because I was older, I have a job that needs dedication, that I would be completely protected from all of this by default. But in the past couple of weeks, I've realised that I'm not."

Maggie heard the break in Alex's voice on the last word. She turned to face the agent and could make out her features in the dim light that came from the kitchen lamp. Self-hatred marred her face and it made Maggie's heart break at knowing Alex had been hiding her doubts from everyone else. They both reached out at the same time to grab and intertwine their hands.

"Do you trust me, Alex?"

"Of course. I lov-"

Maggie shook her head, "Just trust me. There's no pressure to do anything else. Trust me so that you can talk to me."

"You have feelings too, Mags." Alex argued.

"I know, but I'm not hurting myself in dealing with them," Maggie said, softly, although Alex still hung her head in shame to which Maggie lifted her chin with her hand, "But if you start by talking about it, you're already going to get yourself back on track."

Alex nodded. There was more than just self-hatred swirling in her eyes now, there was love and a spark of hope. This woman was prepared to stay with her through a low that would surely lead to more hurt for herself, for Kara, for her colleagues and without a doubt, for Maggie. Her sister may be a hero to the city, but Maggie was the hero to Alex. So she would try for her.

"Everyday something goes wrong before it goes right. The drinks would make that okay for a bit, give me the confidence to carry on again tomorrow. That was at the start. Now, I don't get that feeling but I still chase it and chase it but-I can't… it never comes…" Alex crumbled under the realisation, leaning into Maggie for support. The detective's arms wrapped strongly around her, whispering words of comfort for as long as it was needed.

"You'll be alright. You got me. We can talk to Kara tomorrow. You have her. Then we'll talk to J'onn-" Alex tensed and pulled away from Maggie.

"No, no, no. My job. I need my job, Maggie."

"He'll understand the D.E.O barely functions without you," Maggie assured, pushing Alex in the shoulder, "I'll make him understand."

Alex chuckled and sighed, "I said I'd probably go crazy on you. I'm a mess."

Maggie's head tilted in the way that made Alex's heart flutter and held Alex close again. She could just about make out the gentle thrum of her hero's heartbeat that calmed her; the notion that Maggie could ground her with just her presence was something that Alex never imagined having the privilege of. Just as she could feel herself slipping into the state of unconsciousness again, she heard words that would let her, finally, have a restful night of sleep.

"You're always perfect to me, Danvers."


	2. Telling Kara

"You're ready?"

"Yep."

"Sure? Because your voice just went really high-pitched."

"One-hundred percent ready to admit to my sister that I struggle to control myself when it comes to drinking, and I didn't tell her until now which means she'll be angry and you'd be surprised to know that Kara can be _really_ scary-"

"Alex," Maggie grabbed shaky, sweaty hands, "Calm down, this may seem like the worst thing ever right now, but trust me, you will be so relieved afterwards. Now, are you sure you want me here for this?"

The question was asked as they stood in the middle of Kara's apartment, the woman herself not present because of a busy day at Catco and as Supergirl. This had made Alex's plans even harder, leading her to the D.E.O to talk to J'onn before even being able to confide in her sister. The director's reaction was understanding, but firm. The job was the cause but also a cure, so Alex's duties were to be lighter and more flexible but still full-time. "Think of it as sporadic personal leave.", J'onn had said.

It was dark again by the time Alex and Maggie got a call from Kara, saying she'd meet them at her apartment with food - not that Alex had the appetite. After fifteen minutes of anxious waiting, there was still no Kara.

Alex nodded with hesitation, "I think it will help. It will be fine, you're right. I just need to get a-"

 _Drink._

The agent froze two steps towards the kitchen where she knew there would be the cold beverage that she craved. She closed her eyes against the urge and the guilt for even thinking of reaching for a drink when she had Maggie at her side. Alex felt a tug at her arm and turned to look into the proud, shining eyes of her girlfriend.

"Hey, it's great that you stopped yourself," Maggie reassured, "You're only at the start of this journey."

"What journey?"

Kara entered the apartment after having stealthily opening the door without either of the women hearing the sound of the keys. She held two boxes in her arms and, by the way she spoke with her mouthful, it was clear that the potstickers had been irresistible.

"Alex? A journey? I heard you from the corridor. Are you guys going somewhere? Because you don't need my permission," Kara continued, dropping all of the food on the counter and heading to the fridge. An arm reached in and pulled out a bottle of red wine, "Drink?"

Alarm flashed across Alex's features and she looked at Maggie for help. In return, she got a squeeze of the hand and six strong words.

"Kara loves you. No matter what."

Having heard Maggie's reassurance to Alex, Kara's curiosity and concern increased and she swallowed her bite of pizza.

"Is everything okay, Alex? Scrap that, I know it isn't. Talk to me," Kara insisted, moving to stand in front of her sister, "You're my best friend, my sister. I don't care what it is."

Overwhelmed by the support and love that was almost radiating off her sister, Alex began to talk, "I-I know that I said to you, all those years ago, that I would never go back to drinking and-and all that other stuff again. But recently I've been drinking. Too much. So much that I need help because I'm struggling to concentrate while talking to you just because there's a bottle of red on the counter," Maggie swiftly removed the bottle from Alex's sight, getting a thankful glance in return, "Kara, I just need to know that you can be an amazing person, as you are, and stick with me when I get stupid."

Alex released the breath she'd been holding throughout her small speech. It was all or nothing now. Either Kara would be completely disappointed or she wouldn't.

"Oh, Alex…"

 _Kara hated her._

"Of course I'll be that person."

 _Wait._

 _What?_

The next thing Alex registered was Kara's strong, stable embrace, showing her that if her words weren't enough, then her actions would be. The agent cherished the feeling for as long as she could but…

"I love you for this, Kara, but I think I can hear my bones creaking."

Kara released straight away, looking apologetic, before returning to the boxes of food and gesturing to the couch with them in hand.

"Let's sit."

Alex and Maggie followed Kara across the apartment and sat on the couch while Kara curled up on the chair opposite. She offered them a slice of pizza each - Alex taking two while shaking her head - then settling back and pursuing her mission to empty each box.

Alex felt a pressure on her leg and turned her head to see Maggie looking intently into her eyes, "You good?"

"Yeah," Alex half-smiled and placed her hand over the one on her leg, "Thank you."

Silence then came with their eating and it wasn't uncomfortable, but Alex could feel her sister's glances sweeping over her.

"Kara, I know you have questions. I can see it in your face. Please just ask."

Kara looked sheepish at her own lack of stealth and sighed, "I'm not disappointed in you. Or even upset that you confided in Maggie before me because, let's face it, things have changed in the past year. But how did it change so much that I didn't notice you relying on whiskey more than us?" she asked, gesturing to herself and Maggie.

Alex bit her lip and glanced down, "I don't think there was any one event, I just- I just got _sad_ and drinking was normal and even though I knew it wasn't right, I thought that- to put that burden on you guys would just not be fair."

Maggie heard the word 'burden' and knew she had to step in before Alex began to descend a spiral of doubt. She reached out a hand to turn Alex's face towards her, giving her no choice but to look into open, honest eyes.

"Danvers, I thought you knew by now, the only burden you have is us and that is because we love you. It's been months since we said no more pushing feelings down. Let's not start again now, yeah?" Maggie finished, leaning back and catching a glimpse of Kara's beaming and agreeing face.

"Of course." Alex said, slightly overwhelmed, then closing the small gap between herself and Maggie to capture her girlfriend's lips in a deep kiss.

A deep, _prolonged_ kiss.

" _Guys,_ " Kara whined, throwing her arms over her head, "I'm still here, right here, in this room!"

Maggie waved a hand vaguely in Kara's direction and mumbled, "Eat your potstickers."

Kara groaned.

And Alex smiled, because she had the best family that would help her should she need it. For now, she could kiss Maggie, hug her sister and forget about the drink, at least for tonight.

* * *

 **Thanks for reading!**


End file.
